Reflections and Revelations

NANU NANU

Wed, 08 Oct 2008 00:58:31 GMT

http://www.purdue.edu/convocations/robinwilliams.shtml

So I got to see Robin Williams the other day. Tickets were a bit expensive, but hell it's not every day a legendary comic shows up a 20 minute walk from my apartment. It was pretty much just like his "Live on Broadway" show, just with a different set of current events, which is to say absolutely hilarious. It was real funny watching him rip into people who had cameras as well. Well worth seeing in person.

Of caped crusaders, comics, and cartoons

Wed, 20 Aug 2008 21:19:23 GMT

First, I’d like to say I’m still working on my China entry. Right now it’s at 5 pages and I haven’t even got to Beijing or Hong Kong yet. Once it’s finished I’ll probably upload it in several different pieces.

Instead I’d like to discuss something else I’ve been getting into. Or it might be more accurate to say getting back into after a remarkably long absence. This would be comic books (of the western variety), both conventional and unconventional.

Back in the early 90s when I was in junior high, comic books were insanely popular. The “Death of Superman” was grabbing headlines, The X-Men were everywhere and Spawn was turning the industry on its head. Being the prime target age I was needless to say enthralled. I enjoyed this for a couple of years until my mother decided that they were a gateway to the occult and forced me to get rid of them. Understanding the hopelessness of the situation, I turned to other hobbies. But deep down I don’t think I ever shed that wonder of costumed heroics and having it ripped from me at the height of popularity at a young age only deepened the imprint on me, even if I were to bury it deep in the future.

My second flirtation with comics was during what I like to refer to as my “first” freshman year of College, back in the 2000-2001 timeframe. As this was my first taste of freedom from religious ideological tyranny, I didn’t hesitate to indulge in every formerly forbidden fruit I could lay my grubby hands on, comics no doubt being on the list. Sadly, I was a moron then and indulged in the garbage comics popular at the time (all of which have been justly forgotten). However, there was a ray of hope. A roommate of mine forced me to read Neil Gaimen’s Sandman series. I was blown away. Nothing compared to the racy pulp I had been reading. But this was after my transition from a casual anime fan to a serious one, so it was too late to drag me back to western shores at this point.

I would spend the next 8 years of my life enraptured by Japanese comics and animation. I bought into the popular anime nerd opinion that manga was somehow more mature and complex than western graphic literature. While I recognized there were exceptions like Neil Gaimen, I assumed they were a small minority compared to the garbage I had most recently read (which featured more cleavage than content). I also passed off super heroes as childish due to colorful costumes and what I assumed were simplistic stories. Despite the resurgence classic franchises were seeing on the big screen, I always assumed they were going to such measures because manga had beaten the crap out of them. I felt it was superior storytelling, artwork, and greater maturity that caused manga to triumph over traditional western comics. All they had left was to cash in on their legacies. At least that’s what I thought.

I had flirted with the idea of getting into comics but the massive amount of back history of characters was intimidating. Anime and manga are relatively stand-alone by nature. Comics by comparison were chaos to me.

But in the last year or so, anime and manga has lost a great deal of their luster for me. I think this is due to several reasons.

First, I’ve become disgusted with the community, both online and offline. It’s either ridiculously overzealous, loud, and immature or it’s elitist, cynical, hypocritical and self loathing. There is very little middle ground. You either have fans who emphasize how huge fans they are despite having seen little other than a few of the most popular series or hardcore fans who refuse to admit to actually liking anything despite having seen hundreds of series.

I think much of the novelty of Japanese culture has worn off for me. A great deal of the appeal of anime is the allure of the Japanese culture. After so much exposure, I see very little appeal in it. They’re xenophobic and racist. Their youth are apathetic and selfish. They’re pop culture obsessive. They’re hypocritical when it comes to their morality (i.e. their odd censorship laws compared to their sex obsessed society). Don’t get me wrong, there are still things I like about their culture, particularly their healthy lifestyle (aside from all the smoking), some of their traditional culture, as well as forcing all their young girls to wear short skirts. But in the end that appeal and allure is nearly gone to me.

I find myself less and less interested in new anime series. I see the lineups for new seasons and see very little that appeals to me. Most cash in on current cliché or are just all around half assed. Typically each season there is about one or two shows I’m interested in. I tend to be more interested in older shows from the 70’s and 80’s than I am much of the current offerings. The problem is those shows are a pain to watch since their availability is so limited. We have half a dozen fansub studios taking on the newest shonen or fanservice laden crap, but no one willing to give any real attention to Leiji Matsumoto or Go Nagai. I still enjoy new stuff and will continue to follow my favorite franchises and studios, but I’m just frustrated with nearly every aspect of the anime fandom now.

I’m not sure exactly what catalyst it was that got me to check out comics again. I think it was a page of “Y: The Last Man” I stumbled upon online. It looked interesting, so I acquired it. I haven’t finished it yet, but I found it very refreshing reading a western comic again. Realistic art style, full color pages, witty dialogue, and a perspective I could relate to. A western perspective. My perspective. Inside jokes I got without an asterisk explaining the reference. Reading these comics again made me uncover my long buried love of conventional comics that I had enjoyed so much in my younger days. With major films like Iron Man and The Dark Knight coming out this summer, this only added to my interest. So I dug around online to see just how hard it would be to get into comics. Not nearly as hard as I’d thought. I wasn’t really dealing with so much of a continuous story as I was an episodic one. Sure I needed to know the important stuff, but it wasn’t near as impenetrable as I thought. The first super hero comic I’d read since about 1994 was “Batman: The Killing Joke.” This pretty much sealed my return to comics. Not only was Alan Moore’s story exceptional, but the art was fantastic. Looking at the art work I was trying to figure out again just how I’d once convinced myself western comics had bad art. The writing was mature and really explored the decades of mythology that had been developed for these characters. Then I noticed when this was written. Why the HELL had I just now only realized this kind of stuff was going on? Oh yeah, that’s right… I was busy reading about spineless Japanese teenagers getting nosebleeds from looking at school girl’s panties.

I was particularly impressed by The Watchmen. I’ve been aware of the story for years, but only now decided to check it out after seeing a preview for the movie online. I’m still trying to absorb it all. It was certainly different and I couldn’t have predicted that ending no matter how hard I tried. It was exceptional though, I can certainly understand how it developed the reputation it has. Especially for something that came out in 1986. I’ll probably reread it when the movie comes out (or at this point “if” based on the lawsuit from Fox). I’m really impressed by Alan Moore’s writing, pity he’s crazier than a loon. I should see what the original V for Vendetta was like, I heard it was quite different.

I’m starting out focusing mainly on Batman, but I’m checking out some other titles too. I'm currently reading “No Man’s Land” which I’m enjoying a great deal and I decided to follow the currently running Batman R.I.P. series issue by issue. I picked up everything that’s been released so far and will be following it issue by issue. I probably won’t start reading it until I have read “Hush” since I think that ties in.

In the last couple of years I didn’t feel any great loyalty to the American anime distributers because, quite frankly, they were just unnecessary middle men releasing increasingly poorer products. I purchased all of Hahuri as it came out only to discover half assed subs and a digital transfer that looked worse than my original fansub version. That and I feel it’s the responsibility of the Japanese nerds to support anime. We American anime nerds can do just fine being left out of the equation, and did so before we were even recognized as a market. I’d just as soon return to those days. Now comics on the other hand, that's the responsibility of the American nerd. We’re the primary market and if we don’t support it, it will disappear. I don’t think the international market for western comics is too big. Basically I’ve decided to download all the old stuff since there is just so much of it, purchase my favorites as TPBs, and follow the stuff I like issue by issue as it comes out. I’ll probably just follow each major event, but as I read more my preferences may shift.

I’m not saying the western comics are going to replace my appreciation of anime and manga. There are many series both old and new I plan on following (i.e. the new Nodame No Cantabile that’s coming this fall). Nor do I necessarily feel reading about a man who dresses up as a bat with his underwear on the outside is more mature than watching shows featuring big robots and schoolgirls. But what I will say is that I feel I’ve skipped out on a bottomless pit of quality entertainment rich in mythology, storytelling, character development, and art. This is an oversight I am rectifying and while I don’t think comics will necessarily dominate the spotlight, they will certainly share billing.

With all that said, here’s my opinion on two of the big comic book blockbusters that came out this summer. Didn’t see Hulk, though the idea of Ed Nortan playing Bruce Banner is interesting.

Iron Man – RDJ was the perfect choice. He’s made for this role, mustache, alcoholism and all. The special effects were fantastic and the movie had a great sense of humor. Plenty of action and good storytelling. All of Tony Stark’s dialogue was solid gold. I wonder if RDJ ad libbed any of that. It’s hard to think of Jeff Bridges as a villain, let alone a bald bearded one but I think he did ok. Paltrow was entertaining enough, though I’m not familiar with her in the comics at all. My only complaint was Samuel L Jackson as Nick Fury. I know that the “new” Nick Fury in the comics is based on Jackson, but Sam Jackson isn’t much of an actor instead choosing to portray and exploitative caricature of himself. I know silver age Nick Fury was closer to James Bond than Shaft, but I think they decided that was just too jaded for today’s audience. In the end, RDJ completely stole the show for me and I look forward to seeing him again.

The Dark Knight – Needless to say the hype surrounding this film was insane. I went expecting epic and that is just what I got. Heath was just as incredible as I’d heard. I recently rewatched the original ’89 Batman and have read a shit ton of Joker comics. I think Jack Nicholson did a good job but in the end just felt like Jack Nicholson dressed up as the Joker hamming it up. He clearly had fun with the role and some of his dialogue was priceless, though sometimes I think his physical performance was a bit much. What was so remarkable about Heath’s performance was that he had brought a truly original take on the Joker. While Nicholson was clearly still Nicholson, Heath felt like someone else. He really pulled of the insanity. He brought a strange almost reptilian quality to the Joker and just about any time he opened his mouth it was fantastic. It wasn’t the comic’s Joker, but these new films aren’t meant to be the comics. I do think he really pulled of the comic’s Joker with the whole nurse bit though and I love how he never told the same “origin” twice – very much like the comics I’ve read. Eckhart did a fantastic job as Two-face (leagues ahead of Tommy Lee Jones, but that’s mainly Schumacher’s fault). It’s a pity his performance is going to be so overshadowed by Heath’s. You really did root for him which made it gut wrenching knowing his fate in advance. His transition to Two-Face felt a little too Episode III for me (as in too automatic, not gradual enough to be really believable), but was good enough. Christian Bale is a good Bruce but a mediocre Batman in my opinion. His “batman big boy” voice was ridiculous. He was pushing it with Batman Begins at times, but he went too over the top with Dark Knight. I didn’t care much for Maggie Gyllenhaal, I felt she was forgettable in the role. It’s a pity they couldn’t get Katie Holms back. Aside from some minor performance issues, I felt it ran too long and tried to cram too much into one film. I really liked the whole contrast of Gotham’s “white knight” to the “dark knight.” A lot of really great writing went into this film, even if some of it wasn’t original with this film (the whole “bruce wayne is the mask”), but Dent’s line “You either die a hero or live long enough to see yourself become the villain” was great. All in all, despite my nitpicking, this is an excellent film. Can’t wait for the sequel and if Heath doesn’t at least get an Oscar nod I’ll be damned pissed.

Back in the USSA....

Mon, 11 Aug 2008 04:15:52 GMT

Now that I'm back in the US I can post on livejournal again. I'll probably do a few entries on my trip to China since I have so much to write, but I'm too lazy to now.

of diplomas, internships, and long trips

Tue, 13 May 2008 04:08:22 GMT

This is going to a brief (for me at least) entry as that I need to leave for the airport in a few hours but felt a need to update the 'ol LJ.

I managed to survive this semester so I now have an associates degree in electrical computer engineering technology. I didn't go to the graduation (bit overkill for an associates degree), so they should send it to me in the mail some time over the summer. My grades aren't great (though certainly not bad), but hell, I've made it though the worst part now. And... no more calculus!!!!

I've started my internship this summer. I had less than 48 hours turn around time from the end of my last final to when I arrived at the plant in ohio where the company I'm interning for is based out of. I had three days to learn their entire dc motor production line. My job is to go china and get the chinese dc motor line up and running. For the most part, it just seems to be me on this project. Everyone else directly involved with this project has left the company as far as I can tell (at least on the US side of the fence). The chinese have the ac motors down just fine, but the dc motor line needs a lot of work. Super intern to the rescue! It's a great opportunity and a helluva lot more involved than any normal internship so I'm thankful for the opportunity, but it's a damned intimidating project.

My schedule got juggled around and I'm leaving for china tomorow... in about 5 hours to be exact. I've done the long distance travel thing before, but this is a bit different. I'm nervous but excited. I love traveling, exploring, and seeing new places more than just about anything in the world. I'll be flying in to Hong Kong tomorrow, staying in a obscenely nice hotel somebody like me has no business being in, taking a ferry up the river then heading off to guangzhou. I'll miss the olympics by a week or two, but I'm hoping I can see some other areas of china while I'm there.

I'm going to setup a flickr (I think that is what it's called) or photobucket to dump the massive amount of pics I plan on taking. I'm debating starting a separate blog just for this trip, but I'm undecided at this point. Since the company I'm interning for was kind enough to loan me a laptop, I should be on aim and skype (my new skype name bmoody910) all summer.

P.S. Am I the only amused that the LJ spell check considers "blog" a mispelled word?

Of circuits, cinematics, and comic books

Sun, 20 Apr 2008 02:31:28 GMT

Been a while since I’ve updated, but I’m taking 19 hours this semester so I’m obscenely busy. No cupcake classes either. Honestly, I’ll be lucky to survive it. I should be able to scratch by, but I’m never taking this kind of load again. Three engineering classes (each with a 3 hour lab) and second semesters of both calculus and Chinese. Hell, the curve on the last calc test was insane… a “C” was a 29-36! Overburdening myself seemed like a good idea since I wanted to get my associates in May, but I’m really regretting it now. At this point I should be able to get through everything, but it’s going to be a helluva a lot closer than I would have liked.

The electronics stuff I’ve been doing has been fairly interesting. I’ve been doing audio amplifiers in my power & rf class. We can literally hook an mp3 player into one end of the circuit and a large speaker into the load and hear music. I’m really not into electronics, but this stuff is damned interesting. I’ve been making a DMM in my project class. Runs off a 9V volt battery, LCD display, multi-range voltage measurement and single range current measurement. We designed the printed circuit board, calculated component values, and have been constructing the final version. I had been having some problems with it, but once I replaced the chip it worked like a charm. It’s about 99% accurate worst case right now. In this picture you can see the 44 pin SMT chip... that little bastard can be a pain if you're not careful. It won't win any beauty contests, but it does work. The wire is in there since on of the LCD pins aren't making good contact. If you'll notice, all of it except the LCD and diode are all surface mount parts.

My China trip is all official now. I’ll be flying in to Hong Kong on May 19 and be in Guangzhou until Aug 1 when I had back to the states. I don’t know how much freedom I’ll have over there. I’ll be pretty damned close to Hong Kong so I should be able to go over there a little bit. I’m *hoping* I can go up to Beijing at least once. Hopefully with the Olympics going on that will be possible. Not entirely sure what I’ll be doing, but I’ve got a week of orientation in Ohio that should set me up. All I know is the plant I’m going to makes electric motors. I know a little bit about electric motors, but honestly they can get pretty confusing. Yeah I’m not real good with electromagnetic physics, as interesting as it can be. But I do have the basic principles down (basically, current through a coil induces a magnetic field, multiple poles at different polarities cause the motor to spin). Yeah, kind of wishing I paid better attention now instead of just cramming for tests. I’ll be on skype over the summer so I’ll still be able to keep in touch with everyone I know. Not so sure about too many of the other internet locales I frequent.

When I’ve been avoiding studying, I’ve been watching some interesting movies. I think I should just make a separate blog for movie reviews.

The Jazz Singer (1927). I’ve been meaning to see this damned thing for ages and they finally released it on DVD. It’s the first successful motion picture featuring sound. It’s about 20% talkie and 80% silent, but up until this movie sound films were a disaster. The audio was horrible quality and had a habit of going out of sync. Jazz Singer managed to use sound effectively and featured Al Jolson, an incredibly popular entertainer of the 1920s (and vaudeville legend). Aside from the historical value of the film and its effect on industry, it was actually a pretty good movie. An interesting story about a young jewish man torn between his traditional jewish family and his desire to be a jazz singer in the entertainment industry. The use of blackface makes the racial aspects all the more interesting. This is a film anyone interested in film or turn of the century racial history should check out. The music is pretty good too, though certainly dated.

Sweeney Todd – I thought Sweeney Todd was mediocre at best. I suppose it was entertaining for what it was, but not anything I would call remarkable. I think films like "Corpse Bride" and "Nightmare" had a good deal of heart to them despite being dark musicals. Sweeney just seemed to be lacking in every respect except the cliche macabre. I couldn't connect or sympathize with the characters, the music was meh, and the plot far too predictable. For what little it was, it was very well done, I'll give it that. For me the highlight of the film (aside from alan rickman who is always entertaining) was the brief "house by the sea" song clip. Granted the humor was directly related to contrasting the sooty monochromatic london of the film proper, but that just struck me as a bit of novelty, creativity, and dare I say it, even *color* in such a bland world. Though I did laugh my ass off at the dialogue between Depp and Carter after she noticed Sacha Baren Cohen (sp?) had been murdered. Of course, much of my problem with the film may be the fact that I do enjoy conventional musicals and found this rather lacking. I still think it’s basically “Hot Topic: The Movie.” That and "Benny and Joon" is my favorite Depp movie...

There Will Be Blood – Absolutely fantastic. I loved it. The performances were great and the characters interesting. I loved the clash between logical ambition and religious zeal. The score was great, really heightened the tension of the movie, almost reminding me of some of the old Hitchcock scores. It was damned near flawless in my mind.

The Darjeeling Limited – Pretty much typical Wes Anderson stuff, but still great. Good performances and great dialogue. I loved his use of color throughout the film. The symbolism wasn’t subtle at all, but still very appreciated (almost as appreciated as Natalie Portman’s bare ass).

Ghost World – I can’t believe I’ve waited this long to see this movie. Pretty hard to describe, sort of an odd quirky film based off of a comic book. Basically it’s the misadventures of two small town social misfit girls through the summer after they graduate. It’s pretty damned funny and it has a surprising amount of substance to it. Steve Buscemi and Thora Birch give great performances, and a younger Scarlett Johansen is present as well. I’m really interested in reading the comic version now.

Speaking of comics, I’ve started reading “Y: The Last Man.” Really damned interesting. Basically, every male on earth dies except for one. Now in Japan, this would be the setup for a harem romance of epic proportions. In America, he is hunted down like an animal as he is viewed as a valuable commodity. Kind of reminds of “The Fugitive” at times. It’s done in a surprisingly realistic fashion. Maybe I’m just burned out on anime/manga, but I’m starting to get interested in western comics again. I can’t say I really care about spandex clad super heroes, more of stuff like what Vertigo puts out. I just downloaded comic book reader so I could read "Y", so I may start getting some other stuff. "Strangers in Paradise" looks interesting, I may read some of that after Ghost World.

I just picked up the “She and Him” CD. Really good, kind of 50’s country meets late 60s/early 70s folk. The album has a very genuine honest feel to it. I’m enjoying it a lot.

Almost there...

Sat, 05 Jan 2008 01:59:41 GMT

Haven't updated in a while so this'll be lengthy.

Well, I have only one more semester before I get my associates degree. This semester went well for the most part. Calculus was a bitch, but I made it through. The electronics classes were difficult but I ended up doing pretty well in them (even got an A in one of them, much to my shock). Chinese went well. I wasn't as motivated as I should have been in it, but it didn't get hard till the very end. I managed to get a B with a minimal amount of effort. It's going to bite me in the ass next semester since I blew off A LOT of the later vocab.

Everything seems go for this summer in China. It's kind of nerve racking since there will be a lot of pressure on me to do well. Basically, if I fuck up, my future with that company and contact are ruined. I should do fine, but it's still a lot of pressure. People are going to have obscenely high expectations of me. I like to fly under the radar and that really isn't possible in this situation. Looks like two months, which is interesting because visas apparently are only good for one month at a time. So I may have to hang out for a weekend or something outside of china over there. I'm going to at least try for Tokyo, maybe if I ask nicely I can swing a ticket to okinawa. I've never been to tokyo, but I would love to see some old friends in okinawa if at all possible. I'm pretty much on everyone's good side since I'm doing well in school and am (mostly) staying out of trouble so either option isn't unrealistic.

I didn't really do anything too out of the ordinary this semester. I DID get to see the dalai lama though, that was pretty cool. He stopped by to speak so I picked up tickets. Here is an a forum post I made on the matter that no one seemed too interested in:
http://www.crunchyroll.com/showforumtopic?id=17191&pg=0#4531043

I've been going back and forth between my cultural/intellectual side and my nerd side. I'll indulge in the cultural/intellectual side for a while then I'll get burnt out or frustrated and then go back to the nerd side. I'd say it's spilt about 50/50, though I've spent the last few months mostly doing the intellectual/cultural thing.

I went to the anime club here for a few months earlier last semester. God damn is that place an extraordinary failure. The anime they show is pretty good, but the people are so immature and antisocial. Anime clubs were originally made when anime was hard to get a hold of, so people would pool their collections and watch it together. Nowadays, you can find anything you want online for free so there isn't really a need for that. Anime clubs should be about getting to know people in a huge university like this, which is why I went. And while they did share similar interests, I think I was the only one there interested in meeting people. They watch about 5 fucking hours of anime with one break. During this break they all promptly bust out their PSPs, DSs, and laptops. On the rare occasions there was conversation it was usually nothing more than a series of "oneupmanship" statements. Irritating, immature, elitist, petty and boring. I saw someone online describe their anime club as "socially awkward people yelling awkward things at the screen." That would sum it up. I eventually left because first, it was hard to get to know people, and second, on the rare occasions I did get to know someone it was usually someone I really didn't want to hang around. There were a few cool people there, but it just wasn't worth putting up with the bullshit to stay.

So instead I went to a few bars with the sole purpose of being social. You know, the whole nine yards of "you need to leave apartment/room/basement, clean yourself up, and be social." So I did. I talked with quite a few young women, was social, even got a few compliments from the opposite sex, but in the end it was always the same failure as always. People trying to pick fights because I said "hello" to the wrong girl standing by herself, the same surly bartenders, the same bad music, the same smelly stale atmosphere. And honest to god, most of the women weren't anymore attractive then what I ran into the anime clubs. They were certainly less interesting, even if they were a bit more mature.

I've started using skype, an online friend twisted my arm and got me started. It's actually pretty cool, I was on a conference call with people from all over the world the other night, most who I've met (or known of) casually online before at an anime site. The funny thing is I had a better time just bullshitting with them than I had going to popular local bars or the anime club. I think for me to be successfully social the people in question need to be at least 100 miles away. I have gotten to meet a few cool people online, and well, that's more than I've managed to meet IRL. Maybe I should just invest more time at being social online. I meet interesting people I actually like talking to that way.

I have been successful at indulging myself in more things of a cultural nature. I've been working on the AFI top 100 films of all time list. I've seen 78 of them so far. I certainly don't agree with all of it, but it is a great place to start exploring famous and influential american films. Once I finish it I intend to make my own list just for my own amusement.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/AFI%27s_100_Years..._100_Movies_%2810th_Anniversary_Edition%29

I've come to develop a passion for older films, particularly ones pre-1950. I've been watching silent films as well. I've come to respect the genius that is Chaplin. I'd encourage anyone who enjoys good movies to check out City Lights and Modern Times (though neither of those are entirely silent).

On the cultural side, I'll be visiting england this summer. Not sure what all the itinerary is yet, but we will at least be spending some time in London, as well as seeing a play in stratford-avon. I'd love to go to the british museum and check out all their plunder from running the world during the 19th century. I don't know if we'll have time to go outside of england or not. We booked tickets already, so we'll be there May 9-20.

I've been on hiatus from the anime subculture for a few months (only thing I've done is watch the new genshiken and paprika). I dropped out of it over the summer, then got back into it at the start of last semester, then dropped out mid october. I think one of the reasons I took a break from it was because two of my favorite sites have really gone to shit (crunchyroll and 4chan), that and I was pissed off at the anime subculture in general thanks to that anime club. I think I'm going to dive back into it for a while. I'm making peace again with my inner nerd and after failed conventional social interaction it may just be best that I stick with my escapism and limited online interaction. I've indulged myself in things of a loftier background (opera, jazz, classic cinema, etc.) over the last 9 months or so. It's still all escapism in the end, though there is usually more thought behind it. I'll still continue to enjoy and research these subjects, but I think I've spent enough time in it to feel satisfied at being reasonably cultured. I've been contemplating the concept of the "functional nerd," one who is obsessively into things of a nerd nature but is still capable of functioning in the day to day world.

Also on the nerd side, I've been playing Mario Galaxy. It's the first Wii game I've bought since Twilight Princess. It's a helluva lot of fun. I'm probably just over the half way mark after a couple days of play. It's one of those "I should really quit, but just one more level..." games. Once I finish it I'll do another one of my obscenely long winded reviews.

Sunset of the Twilight Princess

Sun, 08 Jul 2007 18:03:19 GMT

So I finally got around to beating Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess. I pretty much did everything in the game except the cave of trials (which includes getting the last 3 poes).

Overall I enjoyed the game immensely. It’s definitely the best looking Zelda game to date. Is it true “next gen”? Really it should be viewed as a significantly delayed Gamecube game modified to the Wii, and on that account it looks superb. I think the innovative Wii controls really added to game. It’s never been so easy or natural to adventure Hyrule as it is now. My only complain on the controls is I felt the the nunchuck control was rather unresponsive at times. Most of the time it worked fine, but typically when you needed it to work most it wouldn’t register.

The game itself was a good balance of the traditional elements that go into a Zelda game. Exploration, puzzles, and combat. The game was plenty long enough to, I think my final play time was in the neighborhood of 55 hours.

It’s difficult placing this game in the Zelda timeline. It obviously happens significantly after OOT, but in which timeline is a little less obvious. I think this Zelda was very much influenced by the look and feel of the LOTR movies. It’s definitely the most “epic” feeling of all the Zelda titles to date.

The core game was absurdly easy. I think the only time I died was in the very beginning when I trying to figure out how to take out the twilight messengers. Once I got the hang of that, I don’t think I ever dropped below half health. I particularly enjoyed the Darknut battles. They required all of your sword skills and they were still a bitch to take out. Same with Ganon. I found it more fun to just go balls out and attack him with sword play than rely on the method mentioned in the guide (and I still beat him). Some of the mini-games were overly challenging I think. They were fun, but there was so little margin for error they could be frustrating. But most of those games weren’t actually required so I shouldn’t judge them too harshly. I think it should be noted how fantastic the fishing system is in this game, really taking advantage for the Wii controls. I’ll probably go back to the game just explore more of the fishing options (I pretty much did the bare minimum).

I really like the whole “twilight realm” as well. It was quite original (within the Zelda franchise) and I thought it looked fantastic. By lending it a sort of digital air made it feel even more alien.

One of my biggest complaints about the game was the ridiculous amount of rupees you’re given. Seriously, there isn’t that much to spend them on. A magic suit of armor (which I never even used, except to make room in my wallet) and briefly funding Malo (like 1200 rupee cost I think). I don’t mind being given all those rupees, just give me something spend them on. Vendors in dungeons, more frivolous items, just something other than groaning each time that chest I find happens to be yet another orange rupee.

Another thing is you get the really useful stuff too late in the game. Like the damned horse whistle. I can’t tell you how long I spent running around Hyrule field looking for horse grass. Once I got the ability to shape shift at will and use warp points, I didn’t really bother using Epona anymore. I’d just do all my traveling in wolf form from warp point to warp point. Then, around 2 dungeons left in the game, they have the gall to give me a whistle to summon that horse at will. I didn’t even need it anymore! Why not give it to me when I could have used it? OOT let me summon the horse with my ocarina, hell even LTTP let me use my ocarina to summon the bird. Why at the end of the game give me something so useful earlier that I won’t even use? Same thing with the Giant’s wallet – by the time you get this, you’ve spent all the rupees you need to. Only thing it can be used for at this point is to power your magic armor, which you don’t really need to use.

Overall, despite my handful of complaints, I think this was a great game. I’m not sure if it was the best Zelda game in the franchise though. They all have their merits, but I’ll go as far as to say it’s easily the best looking game in the franchise.

Of superstitions, antiquated deities, and free thinking

Mon, 18 Jun 2007 22:55:51 GMT

So I've finished my first week (and then some) of my physics class. I'm enjoying the material itself for the most part, though I'm not particularly fond of homework format.

I've never cared for online homework, and this is some of the most pain in the ass yet. I have a limited number of attempts at the answer to get credit, and the margin of error is rather small. For example, I got a problem wrong for only taking it out to two decimal places instead of three. So if I were to input Pi, 3.14 would be wrong, but but 3.141 would be correct. That and the questions require logical jumps not explained in lecture - nor do the questions even necessarily relate to the lecture or reading...

But aside from all that I am enjoying the class. I can genuinely find the stuff interesting, I'm just not quite so thrilled about the math involved.

~-------------------------------------------------------------------------------~

"For me, it is far better to grasp the Universe as it really is than to persist in delusion, however satisfying and reassuring." - Carl Sagan

Aside from my curriculum, I've been researching science, philosophy, and history on my own to a certain degree just trying to make sense out of it all. The age old question "life, the universe, and everything." I've been mainly reading random articles online, watching documentaries, and reading the occasional book. Lots o' wiki articles as well, but it's best to take those with a grain of salt.

Being raised in a christian home, questioning one's faith wasn't exactly encouraged. Naturally, science was only considered accurate when it was in line with a literal interpretation of the bible. So I grew up think the big bang theory and evolution were schemes cooked up by inferior scientists trying futilely to deny the existence of God, and there wasn't any real proof for any of it. The bible on the other hand, now that was infallible. No contradictions, and science could back everything up. After all, some christians are scientists.

I probably quit being a christian sometime in middle school, but I didn't officially renounce my faith until my sophomore year of high school. I was hoping to get out of going to church, but I was informed that just meant I needed to attend church even more. I'll skip the details of all the battles I had in this area, but I was the only open non-christian in my youth group. Oddly, I was probably the most honest one there.

Interestingly, the idea of being an atheist never really occurred to me. At first it was more of "now I can look at all the other religions." My initial problems with christianity were more targeted at the church itself then the actual beliefs. I still assumed there were supernatural forces at work. I explored neo-paganism for a couple of years and initially liked it quite a bit, but eventually ran into all the same problems I had with christianity. Just because something is older and more original, doesn't make it true. Besides, most of them were just doing little more than live action roleplaying so thoroughly they even had themselves fooled. Since then I've jokingly said that I've been "between religions." I've read a little here, a little there, kind of liked taoism (the religion of being non-religious), but still had some differences with it. In the end I still had problems at some level with pretty much any religion I explored.

So recently I've become very interested in the natural world, everything from the world we live in to the cosmos itself. As I've been researching, I've been astonished at how much we actually understand. Evolution has actually been proven, we have an incredibly good knowledge of the origin of the universe and earth (two different events), and we're learning more everyday. What fascinates me is these brilliant scientists come up with these theories, predict what they should find, and look for them. Sometimes their theories are wrong, but that's ok, it's back to the drawing board. Other times their theories are right and we learn more about the world we live in. If new information is found that contradicts it, then it is either revised or trashed.

How unlike religion that begins with the answer, pieces together what it can, and attributes the rest to magic. Unless it fits the established answer, the data is trashed no matter how legitimate.

I could go on and on about all the fascinating things I've been learning, but I wouldn't be capable of doing the subjects justice. It's just astonishing realizing how much of my youth I spent believing in what amounts too little more than glorified fairy tales.

It's also interesting when you put the bible itself under the microscope. I think some people who attempt to rip the bible apart end up attacking anything they can without researching and over emphasize things that can be explained and accounted for (for example, references to the earth being flat). However there are plenty of other areas that are loaded down with contradictions, poor logic, and outright impossibilities, let alone some of the sheer ethics and philosophy used. Genesis alone is absolutely absurd and thoroughly ripped apart by science (even with evolution out of the picture).

Here is an interesting verse:
"If your own full brother, or your son or daughter, or your beloved wife, or you intimate friend, entices you secretly to serve other gods, whom you and your fathers have not known, gods of any other nations, near at hand or far away, from one end of the earth to the other: do not yield to him or listen to him, nor look with pity upon him, to spare or shield him, but kill him. Your hand shall be the first raised to slay him; the rest of the people shall join in with you. You shall stone him to death, because he sought to lead you astray from the Lord, your God, who brought you out of the land of Egypt, that place of slavery. And all Israel, hearing of this, shall fear and never do such evil as this in your midst." (Deuteronomy 13:7-12 NAB)

That sounds like it would be more more at home in the Koran, not the bible. Sure the OT God was known for being harsh, but that's just absurd. It's also evidence that christians pick and choose what parts of the bible to enforce, and what to ignore. So, we can try to dictate national policy based on a handful of OT verses, but completely ignore anything inconvenient.

I think two quotes by Karl Marx can sum up my opinion on religion (all of them):

"Religion is the impotence of the human mind to deal with occurrences it cannot understand."

"Religion is the opiate of the masses."

The first quote was the original point behind religion. How else could primitive man make sense of the world? As time wore on, we understood more and more, but religion was still a necessity to deal with what it couldn't understand. Over time it's become obvious that just because an explanation can't be found doesn't mean that it is non-existent. For example, we understand exactly what lightening is now. However, primitive man did not and thus associated it with Zeus, Thor, or a myriad of other forgotten deities. Just because they were incapable of finding the natural explanation did not definitively make the supernatural true. Likewise with the mysteries that remain to us.

Another factor in the first quote is that science is very intimidating. Do you want to try to explain radiometric dating to the average person? Understanding any field of science thoroughly reacquires years of study, not something you can get from a few sentences. Simply attributing it all to the supernatural is much easier. No need to bother investigating, the bible says it's true, so good enough. Besides, there are some educated people who have found proof right? There you go. Anyways, If any problems arise, well I have FAITH. Faith isn't a virtue, it's idiocy. You have to really wonder about a religion that likens its followers to sheep. "Blessed is he that has not seen and believes." Wait a minute... blindly believe, unquestioningly and absolutely? That would really come in handy for...

...the point of the second quote. Religion is a tool for controlling the masses. The catholic church used to be masters of it, they could tell Kings how to rule their countries with the threat of hellfire. Look at the theocracy in the middle east. And look how religion was used to manipulate people here in the US for a war in Iraq for the sole intent of financial gain. The same story, told again and again.

But how can one have moral grounding without religion? The bottom line is we all rely on each other to survive. Strength in numbers. Virtually every religion involves a moral code that allow for proper communal living. By having a proper code of ethics we can not only function as a society, but also thrive and progress. Religion isn't necessary for that. One shouldn't require the threat of hellfire and damnation held over them to keep them peaceable with others.

In the end, I've found the best religion to be the total lack and absence of one. We're fortunate enough to live in a day and age were we are capable of understanding so much of the world around us. But that is all for naught if we continue to destroy ourselves and subscribe to a doctrine of lunacy and ignorance.

Of Caesars, Blurry Pictures, and Giusseppe

Tue, 12 Jun 2007 03:54:55 GMT

Yeah I've been gone for a while. I was having some computer problems that prevented me from being online. But those are pretty much all fixed now, so I can now submerge myself in the digital seas of information once more.

~-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------~

So my "personality shift" has been for the most part going well.

I've actually started reading again. I've been picking at "Meditations" by Marcus Aurelius, a book of philosophy and observations by the once Caesar of Rome. Pretty interesting. Instead of long winded existential philosophy I found a great deal of relevant common sense type observations. As I read more, I'll post more about it.

I finally took a trip to the Indianapolis Museum of Art. I was worried after seeing some very distinguished galleries in Europe I'd be ruined, but the IMA was actually fairly impressive in it's own right. A large and varied collection spanning the entire globe, with some fairly notable pieces as well (including a Rembrandt self portrait, as well as Van Gogh, Monet, and a handful of others). The only problem I had was I hadn't allotted enough time to explore! I think it's more of an all day venture (particularly if ones chooses to explore some nearby historical sites as well. I did manage to cover about 90% of it though. Ah well - just gives me a reason to return. The following was one of the more striking lesser known pieces there. It's called "Sunlight" and it's by Frank Watson Benson. Some of the american impressionists are quite impressive in their own right, only problem is they did everything about 20 years too late to get any recognition for it.

I recently had the opportunity to finally see an opera with Anna Netrebko. I've enjoyed her on CD for so long, it was nice to see her on stage. It was the 2005 Salzburger Festspiel performance of Verdi's "La Traviata." It was extraordinary in every sense of the word. Passionate, dramtic, moving, and the music was extraordinary. Netrebko lit up the stage with an electric sexuality that brought Violetta to life. Remarkable how something 150 years old can still deliver such an impact.

I've been watching a ton of old movies. I started working my way through the AFI top 100 (and watching a few others on the side). I found out they're releasing a new list here in about a week, so I'm taking a break. These older movies actually hold up quite well. Pretty much anything with Bogart in it seem to be worth it's weight in gold, same with Audrey Hepburn. I'd like to see some more movies from the 30s, but they're a little harder to track down on DVD. I've literally probably seen about 20 movies or so in the last month so it'd be hard to rattle them all of. I may make a comprehensive movie review index one of these days.

On the music front I've picked up a keyboard and am learning how to play the piano again. I actually remember quite a bit and moving along pretty quickly, at least in being able to hit the right keys at the right time. I should spend some more time learning the mechanics and theory of it all.

Between all the jazz and classical music I've been listening to, it's become difficult to rationalize even listening to rock music anymore. If it wasn't for some of the interesting indeie groups that drift my way (like Blonde Redhead and The Bird and the Bee) I probably wouldn't anymore.

I've been renting some science videos from the library... astrophysics and things of that nature. Talking about the origins of earth, the universe, life itself (the age old question "life, the universe, and everything). I also looked into the theory of relativity a bit. I don't understand it, but I do understand it a little. I've also been watching the HBO series "From the Earth to the Moon," a dramatized account of the early days of the space program. All fascinating stuff. Hopefully it'll keep my energy up for physics (which I just started today - I'll save that for another entry).

Bah I'll cut it off there - I need to get some sleep if I hope to stay awake during class tomorrow.

Of grades, radioactive spiders, and new ideas

Thu, 10 May 2007 05:40:57 GMT

Well, I got the official results back for this semester. Two C's and two B's, so I'm happy. One of those C's is from a class that I started the semester off with a 27% on a test, so it's rather remarkable I was even able to pass. Certainly could have been better, but hey, I'm still in the game. I'm officially half way through the hard stuff now.

I saw Spiderman 3. It was ok. Honestly, it was a pretty good movie, it just wasn't near as good as the first two. How they did Venom was my biggest complaint. It's like they were shown a picture of him and told "his suit is an alien" and just made shit up from there. Well, looks like it's up to Harry Potter to save this summer movie season for me. I probably won't like PotC since I didn't care much for the last one, but as long as it indulges my swashbuckling Keira Knightly fantasies even further I'll be happy.

Been listening to the new NIN album. Pretty good actually, though not on par with anything he did in the 90s. Very noisy, but in a good way. Just "acquired" the new Manson album (it's not out officially for another month). So far not too impressive, but we'll see how it grows on me. I'll be interested in seeing the visual direction he takes with this.

~----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------~

So I've been doing a lot of thinking recently. I've decided it's time for another "reinvention" of myself. I do this every several years, and I haven't really done one since... I think my first year in the military. I transitioned from freak (in the high school sense of the word) to geek. Now, one would think transitioning from a military serviceman to a college student would be a reinvention, but that's really just my day job, so to speak. I'm still the loud geeky old Moody. I think I was expecting a lot things to magically change once I entered college, but unsurprisingly they didn't. I'm still in a sausage fest situation (arguably more so when viewed strictly on my day to day interactions). I lost a lot of weight last summer, but I put some of it back on over the year. I'm still nowhere near as bad I was when I separated, but I'm definitely back on the heavy end of the scale now (lost 50 or so lbs, gained about 20 back). And of recent I've been getting more and more fed up with the geek subculture.

I think I've been using the internet as a replacement social life. That sounds pretty absurd, but when I think back to how much time I've spent just surfing the internet - not watching movies, playing games, just browsing - it's downright appalling. It was pretty hard for me to break my WoW addiction, and all I've done is just replace it with something else. I was getting pissed off at how immature, simplistic and petty the whole 'online' culture is. And then it donned on me - I was looking in a mirror and not liking what I was seeing. It's not like I'm really all that far removed anymore.

Basically, about 10% of my interests are of a more intellectual nature, while 90% are of a geek nature. Sure I enjoy music, literature, poetry, history, and to a limited extent science, but they always played second fiddle to anime, video games, sci-fi/fantasy, etc. I intend to swap that ratio. I don't intend on abandoning all my geek hobbies, just shoving them to the background.

This came about by a lot of things, not just reflections on my internet dwellings. I think a lot of it has come from a dissatisfaction with the world around me in general, not just my own private slice of it. We are living in a society that no longer values culture and progress. But before I start condemning the world around me, do I really value these things myself? The fact of the matter is I do. And I wondered why I didn't spend more time engaging in these activities that overall produce a greater sense of self satisfaction.

But it's not just a matter of hobbies, it's also a sense of self identity. I've identified myself as a geek now for - what - 5, 6 years? And just what has it gotten me? Thousands of dollars worth of junk and years of my youth lost in a world of escapism.

I think to best sum it up, I'll quote a notorious little book:

First Corinthians 13:11 -
"When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things."

Perhaps a bit harsh to the culture I used to love so much, but I see people I knew getting married and having kids, and I'm still watching cartoons and hanging out on the internet.

This summer I have quite a few things I want to accomplish (mainly get into shape, sever my online addiction, become more cultured), and then once school starts become a lot more proactive about that whole "life" thing I keep hearing about. Ideally, I'd like to get married before I leave school and I need to get cracking if I want to make that happen. I'm seven years older than all those single freshman gals now =/. There is a couple of non-geek clubs I'm thinking of joining, mainly just to meet members of the opposite sex because gods know I can't do that in my major. I've gained some weight, but I lost weight before, so I know how to do it, it's just a matter of disciplining myself to do it again. I'm going to try and culture/educate myself further in certain areas as well. I'm really getting into Jazz (I'm beginning to understand why it's called the classical music of america), so I'm going to learn more about that, as well as try to get into some more science related subjects (particularly astronomy) and read some of those wonderful books growing dust on my shelf.

To start off I think I'll make a facebook profile. College students apparently don't use myspace. You need either a college or work email in order to make a profile, and you can severely limit access to your profile (for example, no one except Purdue students could access mine unless I personally ok them). It might seem odd severing an online addiction would include establishing an online profile, but it does actually make sense. It's one more line stretching out to the outside world, one more connection. No forums, no nothing like that.

I picked up some workout clothes and an mp3 player (not one of those infernal ipods), and earlier this semester I picked up a nice pair of new balance running shoes. There is a cool park/forest area near campus, so I think I'll run there. I hate running on pavement and treadmills (mainly because of shin splints), so I think I'll enjoy running on the paths in that forest much better. No need to push for times like in the air force, just run/jog as much as I can and walk whenever I feel like it. No miles or times to make, just lose weight. My apartment complex has a gym so I'll do some strength training as well. Since I'm going rock climbing/white water rafting at the end of the summer I need to build up some upper body strength.

I'm debating starting a new livejournal or a just deleting most of these entries. I'm leaning towards developing a new online personality for myself. I've used "azrael910" for so long now it's hard to imagine using something else, but I think it might be high time that I did.

Another semester down...

Fri, 04 May 2007 20:18:08 GMT

Just finished my last final. It was.... very bad. At least I wasn't the only one who found it painful. Everyone else thought it was horrid. I studied 3 damned evenings for it too. I just needed to get a 33% on it *crosses fingers*. God it was a digital nightmare.

Semester could have gone better, but I should have passed everything. Well, after that digital final I'd better not count my chickens before they're hatched. This semester was harder, but I was organized better. So no real improvement in the actual results, but hey, I'm still here. There were only 50 people taking the final in my class, so we've lost quite a few from our original 130. Probably going to lose at least a dozen more by next semester.

I'm going to be taking physics this summer. Ugh. I've never had physics before so I'm really concerned about it, but I don't have any other classes to worry about. So it'll go faster, but I can devote all my time to it. I'm trying to get into with a positive attitude. I've always been interested in it, just never enough to really pursue it on my own. I was planning on reading some Carl Sagan or maybe Stephen Hawking's "A Brief History of Time" to help get me more interested in it.

Still no job for the summer... i have enough money to get by for a month, but I really need to get a job. Picked up a handful of applications today. I'll probably turn them all in on monday, after I get back from a quick trip home.

I'd like to see Spiderman 3 this weekend. We'll see how things go.

I've got a lot of things I'd like to accomplish this summer... I'll save that for a future post though.

almost there....

Mon, 16 Apr 2007 06:16:58 GMT

I haven't posted as much about all my tests and academic stresses this semester, but they are present. I've been in particular stressing about my math class. I bombed my first math test (as in a real bomb not a "OMG I got a 65! wut will I do???" bomb). The second test I did poorly, but it wasn't devastating - enough to stay in the game, but not get ahead. So I'd been studying for several days for it getting ready for the test. I knew I had a good shot at this test since the material isn't too bad and it's pretty quick to work through (I did poorly on the last test because I ran out of time... I actually knew most everything on the test, I just needed an extra 20 mins or so to work it all out). So this was my "make it or break it" test so to speak. If I bombed it, I was toast and would fail the class. If I did mediocre, I'd have to bust my ass and do well on the final just to pass the class. If I did well, then I would actually have a decent shot at a decent grade in the class.

So I sat to down tp take the test (evening exam). So far so good... skipping the longer ones and getting all the easy ones first. When I nervous I tend to chew on the ends of pencil, so I was gnawing away like a beaver with an oral fixation. And then I felt my pencil break in my mouth. I pulled my pencil out, and lo and behold, it was fine... it was my tooth that had chipper, an old filling on my front tooth had broken apart on me. So yeah, halfway through the test, my mouth starts falling apart. I put the chunk of my tooth in my pocket and continued with the test. Turns out I got a 93% on the test. That's downright miraculous for me. I'm as good at math as Helen Keller is good at paint by numbers. Only one I missed was a "none of the above" question , which I never pick unless I'm 110% sure it's right. It's so seldom the answer it's usually not worth gambling on. So I'm pretty damned happy about that. I still have to work hard for the final, but A LOT of the pressure is gone. Unless I seriously bomb it, I should be able to pass the class.

I ended up ditching classes the next day and got my tooth fixed. So $175 and less than 24 hours later, my mouth is whole again. So I got a 3-day weekend out of it at least, though I'll be wishing I was in those lectures this week.

Got a schedule put together for studying for finals. I just have to get it matched up with my study group now. That and I have 2 tests this week and lab practical. God I hate the end of the semester... so much studying and stress.

Summer shouldn't be too bad though. I'm going to take physics to ease up my burden next semester and most likely get a job at one of the local liquor stores (lord knows I have the experience and my alcohol tobacco commission license is still valid). I've decided not to do an internship this semester. I could have gotten one, but I decided it was too early. I just don't know enough to really get a whole lot out of it. Instead I just asked my father if I could tag along with him on a business trip to China. I think I'll get more out of that at this point. See things from an industry perspective, get a nice brief introduction to the place with a safety net in place, and get a better idea of what all is ahead of me.

No omgwtfamazing vacation plans this summer. Looks I'll be white water rafting and rock climbing in west Virginia at some point (only 6 hours away from where I live), which is fine by me, those are few of a very short list of outdoor activities I enjoy. Means I need to get in shape though. I'm nowhere near as big as I was back in my air force days, but I have put on some weight over the last year. I may have learned a lot, but kind of hard to work out when you're stuck studying all the damned time.

I may end up tagging along with my mother to either Oregon or Monterrey, California as well. My father likes to send me with her on vacation so he doesn't feel guilty about sending her by herself. I've been both places, though it's been a long time since I've been to Oregon. Not sure where I'd rather go to be honest. I used to live in Oregon. We'd be visiting old friends, hitting up the coast, maybe check out some wineries (Oregon, believe it or not, is one of the best wine regions in the US). I'd love to go back to the Columbia river gorge, but who knows. Hmm maybe if I can get back in shape, I can try windsurfing... prolly not though. I'll probably end up being stuck in living rooms with people I vaguely remember. I just went to Monterrey a few years ago (right when I got back from the middle east) and enjoyed it immensely. We had a beach front room, so that was especially cool. It's just a fun city. My sister may tag along as well... she is mixed bag of fun to travel with to say the least.

"use only for intended purpose"

Sat, 17 Mar 2007 20:17:54 GMT

Recently that phrase has been going through my mind allot, specifically related to my academic endeavors. I’m one of those people who are “wired” for language, literature, and history. I’ve always despised math, floundered in science and done so-so in technology. So why exactly am I pursuing such a challenging technology related major, and then career? Practicality. The job market is much better for science and technology then the things I’m actually good at. That and I want to do something useful, something that contributes.

But the longer I spend in engineering technology the more I’m beginning to realize this just isn’t for me. I knew it was going to be an uphill battle, but I’m thinking I may have bitten off more than I can chew. This math is absolutely killing me, and I have a year of calculus and a semester of physics to go. The Analog, while not as bad as math, is a bear to deal with. Time consuming, confusing, and very complicated. The digital is okay, I can understand it better than anything else, but it’s still no picnic.

It’s become apparent how miserable I am doing this over spring break. I didn’t have much time to think about it when I was so busy actually doing it. But now that I’ve had a couple days to pause and reflect, I realize just how much I really don’t belong on this path. Doesn’t it make more sense to do what I’m not only good at, but enjoy as well? Why fight and struggle to learn how to do something I don’t particularly care for? Is there any guarantee that I’ll magically start enjoying it once I graduate? Sure the money would be nice, but I’ll be working my guts out once I graduate. Hell, I probably would be working my guts out for the rest of my life. It would be a very nice life, but a very busy one. Someone I know has graduated with basically the exact same setup I have. Same major, with an emphasis on Chinese. He is miserable. He seems to hate his life. Granted, he’s not as outgoing as I am (he makes me look like a live wire by comparison). Still, it’s a rather grim picture of the future to look forward to.

I’ve looked at transferring into programming (comp sci basically), but the requirements are pretty high, and I’d have to take all the same math anyways (which is my major stumbling block). Same story with business. Steep requirements, lots of math.

So that really only leaves the dreaded Liberal Arts left. I’ve always excelled at English and history, but there is nothing I can really do with that aside from teach. And there are plenty of English and history teachers out there looking for work. And then it occurred to me – why not foreign language? I’ve always had a knack for language, why not just focus on a foreign language? It’s certainly something I enjoy. A language I happen to like, say Japanese for example? Japan can always use English teachers, and the demand for a Japanese teacher in America is probably better than that for a history teacher. I could major in Japanese, go over to Japan, teach English, and if/when I get tired of it, come back to America and teach Japanese.

I really enjoy teaching. I lead study groups quite a bit, as well as walking people through labs and homework. Last digital test I had a small crowd around as I walked them all through the practice test, problem by problem, till they all understood it. I think I would enjoy teaching quite a bit. I know it’s not all idyllic eager young students or anything, but I think I’d enjoy a hell of a lot more than engineering. And language isn’t something totally worthless like an English teacher – I could do other things with it like translation and what not. I could even parlay it into another career if I wanted to.

It’s not so much an anime-fanboy thing since I’ve already been to japan and know that the whole japan=anime paradise isn’t quite all it’s cracked up to be, it’s more of an interest and fascination with the culture – both traditional and popular. Chinese would probably be more practical, but I think that’s a place I’d rather visit than live.

It may not be in my best interest to stay here at Purdue, but I’ll see if I can make it work.

I’m scheduled to speak with my counselor on Monday so I’ll get her feedback on it. See if it’s even a viable option at this point. I’m probably going to either fail math this semester or just barely scrape by. I couldn’t find any requirements for transferring, but I played the whole transfer game my last time at college and I don’t want to have jump through all the hoops again. I’m too old to waste a year trying to get into a program.

When few stood against many

Sat, 10 Mar 2007 05:37:48 GMT

Just got back from seeing 300. EPIC. Only word to describe it. One giant glorious digital orgy of machismo and violence. Personally I loved it, but those looking for a traditional historic epic are going to be disappointed. Some serious historical liberties have been taken with it, but it's based on comic book retelling of a historical event. It's basically the "Sin City" version of the Battle of Thermopylae. The movie is virtually all digital, heavily stylized, and has some mythological type creatures (giants, monsters, etc.). It’s not an attempt at recreating history – which some critics seem to think it is – it’s a comic adaptation. But despite some departures, it still remains true to the core of it’s source material – that few stood against many with a certainty of death defending what they held dear.

I’ve read up a bit on the battle and the Spartans themselves and while it isn’t a detailed play by play, it does capture much of the essence of the Spartans and that battle. They were a fiercely independent militaristic society who held honor first and foremost. It’s really a very inspiring movie and story.

Visually the movie is stunning. The palette was chosen to display the contrasts. Everything is extreme, more human than human. That goes for the violence as well. The photography wasn’t so much action intense as it is the Spartans assuming dramatic poses with CG being ripped apart around them, with jarring cinematography. The effect is quite something.

The best part is that critics are hating this movie. It’s being called homophobic, militaristic, racist, chauvinistic, etc. Now you think a movie filled with half naked muscular men would be about as subliminally gay as possible, but in history Sparta was known for it’s condemnation of pederasty (at least to the point of physical intimacy) and was known to condemn Athens for their practice of it, as well as a condemnation off homosexuality in general. History is shaky as to whether or not this was just an image that Sparta maintained or if it actually practiced what they preached. When researching anything involving homosexuality in history it’s a little difficult to sort out the idealized revisionism of the gay culture to the reality of the time in question. It is known that Sparta emphasized that relationships between men remain chaste and not be based on physical appearance. This was carried over into the movie when they called the Athenians “boy lovers” – that alone is going to cause bad reviews in Hollywood. Gay cowboys? Bring ‘em on. Historically accurate portrayal of condemnation of homosexuality? OMGZ no not that! The Persians were portrayed in a rather racist manner. The Persian empire did stretch into Africa and India so I think it was quite fair to include those of a darker complexion. I think Hollywood is pissed that they were shown exclusively as villains – sorry, that’s the way history was in this situation. Not every event in history has a noble token black guy next to the main character. And this is based on a graphic novel - in order to keep with the extreme stylistic tone of the movie, these things were ramped up. As far as militarism, this I think they are particularly appalled at. It depicts the Spartans as honorable people (which they were) and their sacrifice as noble and for the sake of preserving the freedom their people (which it was). That’s not “in” right now. I don’t believe we’re fighting the war on terror like we should be, but I feel it is necessary. Sorry Hollywood, history isn’t always politically correct. Not everything is about the oppressed rights of minorities or young hedonistic people on voyages of self discovery set to catchy indie rock music.

Another big criticism the movie is getting is it’s more like a video game and not a traditional location shot movie (like Gladiator). Uhm, so people aren’t allowed to use innovative technology in movie making anymore? Reminds of the rascals who made that one film a while back… rather controversial really, they almost didn’t allow it nomination for an academy award – that would be “The Jazz Singer” the first ever “talkie” or motion picture with sound.

This big thing you have to remember when seeing this movie is it’s not intended to be an accurate representation of the event in question. It is a stylized comic book adaptation of it. Things are exaggerated on purpose, to make this seem bigger than life, intense to the most extreme degree possible.

There were some departures from history, some famous lines missing and some events that never would have happened. In particular, the King’s wife is accused of adultery while the King is away. This would never have happened since it was common practice for numerous men to sleep with married women, with the full knowledge of the husband (and vice versa). This was done so that the woman would be more likely to become pregnant and give birth to another Spartan. There have been jokes made that adultery would have been impossible to define in ancient Sparta, so that glaring oversight in the movie is unfortunate. The Oracle’s prophecy was also screwed up. The Spartan’s weren’t particularly religious (from what I’ve gathered), but the movie makes them seem downright anti-religious. I don’t think this was true, but I certainly have no objections with direction the movie took with that. But these are overall pretty trivial in the grand scope of the film, and only seem to happen when the focus shifts from the actual battle to the “home front.”

It’s easily one of my new favorite movies and well worth seeing if you can stomach the violence and are not offended by men behaving like men instead of the whipped sensitive animals the media would prefer.

For more reading:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sparta
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Battle_of_Thermopylae

Thought Crime

Tue, 06 Mar 2007 05:49:37 GMT

So there has been something bugging me recently. It seems we have become SO politically correct that to even utter something politically incorrect is nearly becoming illegal. Recently people have been up in arms about saying "nigger" or "fag" or any other derogatory term one can think of. It's not just frowned upon anymore - it's something that is thought to warrant REHAB. Take for example Michael Richard's going crazy at that club, or Mel Gibson being pulled over and his drunken ravings, or Ann Coulter calling John Edward's a faggot. Now I'm not saying I agree with them, but to make it sound like they have a mental condition warranting treatment because they don't happen to agree with the status quo? What the hell is wrong with this country? Whatever happened to the right to believe whatever you want to? For example, I can pick up a rock outside of my apartment and decide that it is GOD. Not just a god, divine, but out and out the one and only GOD. Nobody can question this belief. But if I were to call a gay man a faggot, or a black man a nigger, or whatever, I could get in trouble. One city has actually banned the word "nigger." WTF? Banning a WORD? What's next - burning books that aren't politically correct?

One of my favorite example is a group of college kids who posted some pics from a martin luther king jr day party they had on myspace. They were goofing off eating fried chicken and drinking malt liquor and dressed up in stereotypical hip hop clothing. It's up to myspace whether or not they want to host those pics or not. But what got me was the downright scandal it caused on their school. The school leadership was notified, and there was a local school meeting called for open dialogue between students of different races. I saw a video clip of people crying and hugging. The best part was one of the kids involved giving one of those stupid hip hop handshake deals to one of the black students at the end. Yeah... that's not reinforcing stereotypes or anything. Although it certainly wasn't in good taste, they have the right to exercise free speech don't they? I mean hell, the party was in their apartment, it wasn't like they were parading down the street. And who's business was it anyways - only people who could really have a problem was the organization hosting the pics (myspace) - it wasn't anyone else's business.
http://www.wfaa.com/sharedcontent/dws/wfaa/latestnews/stories/wfaa070125_mo_racialfirestorm.1d0816eb.html

Here in Indiana there is a scandal going on right now about a sorority (not at my school) removing ugly girls and minorities from it's membership. The official reason they were given was "failure to meet recruitment standards." Fair enough in my opinion - they should expect that shit getting involved with the greek system. Now I don't know much about the Pan-Hellenic associations or the individual soririties charter, but it strikes me as odd that there are sororities dedicated to blacks, hispanics, asians, so when a regular sorority decides all it wants are attractive white girls everyone is up in arms.
http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/story?id=2907511&page=1

Here is what pisses me off - it's not a two way street. Have you ever seen pics from a gay pride parade? Now, one would be lead to believe by the media that it would be a bunch of regular people walking down the street, with tasteful signs and banners. After all, homosexuals are just like the rest of us aren't they? They just have a different sexual preference, other than that they're perfectly normal. So why is it that gay pride parades are synonymous with celebrations of sexual deviancy? Do you really need to go down main street in bondage gear or women's underwear to express your pride in being gay? Do you think that maybe - just maybe - someone might be offended by seeing a large overweight man in dominatrix gear going down a blocked off main street? Oh wait - it doesn't matter if I'm offended. In fact, if I think that it's morally reprehensible to behave in such a manner in public I should go to rehab to get my thinking "corrected."

Pics from NYC gay pride parade (first page of google images): http://www.costumenetwork.com/MainGallery/album03?page=1

No, nothing offensive there! just as long as no one in the crowd yells "fag" though... that would just be rude and highly inappropriate. Seriously, I don't give a rat's ass what they do behind closed doors but for the love of god keep it there. Don't expect society to conform to you if you aren't willing to conform to it.

This is an onion article I found while looking for source pics, but it pretty much communicates just what I mean: http://www.theonion.com/content/node/28491

So I'm not allowed to be offended by behavior that would get you shot a a couple hundred years ago, but I can be taken to court for calling someone a name.
http://news.rgj.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20070214/NEWS01/702140357/1004/NEWS01

WTF is wrong with this place? Have we lost our goddamn minds? Does freedom of speech mean anything any more? Or is it only applicable when furthering the causes that are acceptable at the moment?

(for the literature impaired, the title is a reference to 1984)

Let them eat cake

Sat, 03 Mar 2007 08:32:27 GMT

So I just watched a pair of movies - "Man of the Year" and "Marie Antoinette."

Man of the Year was an odd film. The first half was just what I was expecting - a funny political comedy featuring Robin Williams. The second half however, was not. It was a bizarre suspense thriller about a girl involved in the computerized voting malfunction that made Robin Williams president. It was just... odd. I can see the point they were trying to make - don't institute a system you can't 100% trust, but I wanted to see a comedy, not some ghey suspense thriller that just seemed awkward more often than not. They ended it well, and the first half is golden so it's a solid rental but not worth purchasing. But it's not entirely what they bill it as. It ended up feeling alot more serious and grim than it should have.

Marie Antoinette... WOW is all I have to say. What an interesting film. I'm glad someone has decided to de-villainize her at long last - she was really just the wrong person at the wrong time and a victim of her upbringing. She was only 19 when she became full blown queen. She had no idea what was going in the world outside of Versailles. The movie - at least in the first 3/4 - was exceedingly accurate. She even made the same huge ink blot when she signed her marriage certificate just like in the movie. Many small details are based on history as well. If anything, they toned it down. Once the french revolution thing was in swing, she became a scapegoat for France's problems (she was called madame deficit). While she was a reckless spender, she really didn't have any understanding of money. The world you saw in the movie was the only world she knew. She didn't know anything of the lower class or the conditions they were living in. The king, just as they showed, was an odd duck overly fond of hunting and reluctant to sleep with his wife. The only liberty they took with him was he was rather rotund late in life. I don't think they accurately portrayed Marie late in her life - in reality she did come to an understanding of her royal obligations and became involved, but at this point not only was it too late but she went the opposite way she should have - she heavily endorsed royal sovereignty which was not to the public liking and persuaded her husband to pursue that route. They were actually given numerous opportunities to adopt a hybrid style of government but refused to.

It’s really a tragic story. This lifestyle was so ingrained into them they couldn’t see a world outside of it. At one point – once prisoners of the revolution – they made an escape attempt (engineered by Marie). It was actually pretty good (I mean hell they managed to get out family and all from confinement) save for one “minor” detail – they made their escape in the fully loaded royal carriage headed for the Austrian border. I believe they were apprehended about 45 miles from the border (that’s off the top of my head though). That would be like fleeing in a limo. It sounds absurd now, but in reality that was the only way they knew how to live. Royal etiquette was so ingrained into them. The irony was her mother wrote numerous times warning of the problems in the country which she only headed far too late. It’s hard to feel sorry for her when you look at history and see how bloody obvious it was, but at the same time, when you look at her background one can see why she behaved as she did. I also like how the movie dispelled the myth that she said “Let them eat cake” (which she never did). I find it interesting they didn’t mention any of the obscene explicit cartoons of her floating around – they were pretty extreme even by today’s standards (that line “Thomas Jefferson admiring the queen’s bush was mild). By the time Versailles fell she was depicted as sexually voracious woman sleeping with demons. She herself was often depicted as inhuman towards the end (often as a harpy). She did engage in a affair (it’s understood, though never technically confirmed), but it’s hard to blame after witnessing her husband. I like how they accurately portrayed her awkwardness being Austrian. She was definitely an outsider never fully accepted, and I think that’s where a lot of the deionization came from. She was just an easy target. In reality it was the foreign policy and behavior of the aristocracy that caused all the problems – her spending, while extreme, was a drop in the bucket compared to what was going on.

They skipped the whole necklace affair which isn’t surprising, but I was wondering if they’d include it or not. It can be read in detail here:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Affair_of_the_diamond_necklace

The actual movie itself was very well done and not what I was expecting. I was expecting the same old historic costume drama which it was but not quite… they incorporated modern language and modern music to make the film much more relative, and dare I say, human. I was wondering just where they were going to end it since she lived for a decent while after capture (4 years) and even technically retained her title in a republic monarchy (though they were powerless) for a short while. I like how and where they ended it since that effectively was the death of the Marie Antoinette of legend.

It really makes it apparent just how human we all are regardless of our birth or circumstances.

I play Slayer on my Ocarina

Sat, 17 Feb 2007 06:56:15 GMT

Just finished Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time. Overall, it was an incredible game. Classic epic storyline, good balance of action, puzzles, and exploration. The story was over all very good. It was very traditional, but enough twists and turns to keep you interested. Some parts were predictable, others not so much. Some of the characters were really well done, others seemed a little cliché, but that’s okay. I particularly liked how they fleshed out Ganon quite a bit more. They gave him a background and identity, and more importantly, a personality. Interesting how he seemed quite a bit more “immature” than the Ganon from Wind Waker.

After playing through Link the Past, it’s clear how much a Zelda game this is despite being 3D. Same basic gameplay, all be it from a different perspective. Dungeons work about the same, and there is a balance of overworld/dungeon action. Even the alternating between multiple worlds/times which is now a Zelda standard (I think LTTP was fist with that). New aspects have been added, such as horse riding and music. Well LTTP did have an Ocarina, but all it did was summon a bird to fly you around the map. You couldn’t actually “play” it. Despite some complaints I have about the targeting system, it was overall a great and novel idea that brought a new depth to combat. It was perfected in Wind Waker and Twilight Princess, so I can be a little forgiving with some my issues with it

I really enjoyed the game, but there are some issues I had with it. First and foremost – the camera. The camera caused me much grief throughout the game. This really isn’t unusual for third person games of that time though. They weren’t the subtle art form that they are now. I think Tomb Raider was the first major third person adventure game released, and that predated OOT by about 2 years. I found the controls to be a little bit unresponsive, but I’ve heard this is normal for the Gamecube versions. The targeting system, while overall a great idea, could get frustrating for how easily you could lose your lock. Overall, these are very minor issues that seldom took more than a few minutes to overcome worst case scenario.

Navi was a great idea, but they made her far more annoying than she should have been. HEY LISTEN HEY LISTEN HEY LISTEN, and then when you do stop and listen nine times out of ten it’s something mind numbingly obvious, like I need a key to get through a locked door. But every once in a while, she had useful information which made you inclined to listen in case you were missing something important. Her and John Madden would get along – Madden “What they really need to do now is get the ball and score,” “Navi, “HEY! Those bars are iron! You can’t get through them!” God imagine the nightmare of having both of them do commentary on a football game.

This is really the key piece of the puzzle in establishing the Zelda history. I saw a good video on youtube about the Zelda timeline, and after playing some of them I’m not quite sure I agree. Well, still lots more games to play. Nice problem to have.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RXN1BF65WjI (that whole series is pretty good as well).

It was interesting finally playing through this game on my own, as an old roommate of mine from my first round with college worshipped this game. I saw him play it quite a bit, but I wasn't really into video games back then so I took little notice. I still talk to him from time to time, and I think we'd get along a lot better now. But I lived with him back in my black metal/pagan days, so he quite correctly thought I was a fruitcake.

Viewing the game in the context of when it was released, this game is easily deserving of the praise and legendary status it has. However, I think the game was improved upon with Wind Waker, and even though I'm not far into it, Twilight Princess.

woot! snow day extended!

Wed, 14 Feb 2007 17:34:46 GMT

They extended the snow day to cover today as well! Classes resume thrusday at 6am. This is a really big deal since they haven't canceled school while class is in session for 23 YEARS. And the winters here are always nasty. I'm shocked it was canceled today. Yesterday was a legitimate safetey concern, but today appears to be fine out there. There is a shit-ton of snow, but the it's not snowing and at least where I'm at it's not windy. I heard (though from nowhere official) there was a snow emergency declared in the county and you could get a ticket being out on the roads unless you had a damned good reason, so I'm thinking that is the cause. Yeah just checked, apparently the county asked them to cancel school even though the campus has been cleared. GO TIPPACANOE COUNTY!

This is unbelievably awesome since I had a digital test this evening. The buses don't run late at night, so I was looking to have to walk in this cold weather. I don't have a parking permit, but I could park in a garage. But I'm a pretty bad driver and these roads are nasty so I decided that bundling up was a better option. Thank god. I'm not sure when he is going to reschedule the test to, but hey at least I get some extra study time. I'm doing fairly well in digital this semester, though I'm not aceing it by any stretch of the imagination. I was going to ask about frequency division (which still confuses me a great deal) in class today, but now I'll hopefully have a few days extra to study.

Twilight Princess - Frist Impressions

Wed, 14 Feb 2007 02:41:14 GMT

I've got about 3 major dungeons left in Ocarina of Time so I though I'd take adavantage of the snow day to try out Twilight Princess. Mainly just to play through the intro and get a feel for the game. SI played for a few hours, stopping right before going into the forest temple after getting my green tunic.

All I have to say is DAMN. This game is beautiful. The world is detailed, fresh, and alive. The art is top notch to boot. I was concerned it would be too gritty and realistic and lose some of the charm from OOT and WW, but my fears were put to rest once entering the world - as if OOT was the middle ground with WW being the most exaggerated and TP being the most realistic, though certainly not an attempt at photo-realism.

It took me a while to get used to the combat setup with the wiimote and nunchuck, but it's really fun now that I've gotten the hang of it. The wolf portion was rather awkward, but I eventually got the hang of it. I do NOT like the lack of a ranged attack when dealing with dive bombing ranged enemies, I'm not sure if that will ever be addressed or not. It's certainly different I'll say that. Even though I picked up Okami I still haven't even put in my PS2 yet, but I suspect there are some similarities. It's added a different dimmension (literally when you examine his "senses") to the game.

The plot is interesting and as plausable as anything, though I'm trying to figure out where it fits in the Zelda timeline (I suspect it'll make sense once I finish). There is alot familiar stuff, like sound effects and music, and targeting system is much the same from OOT and WW.

The fishing was surprisingly fun as well. I was impressed that you actually had to set the hook to catch the fish - and you just used the Wii like a normal rod and the hook was set. I think a full blown fishing game for the Wii could be awesome based on what I've seen so far. Wait... am I saying fishing was fun after complaining about RL fishing in alaska? Nope, fishing in hyrule is much better. If fishing in Hyrule was like RL fishing, then you sit in front of your screen for hours waiting for a bite, that would most likely get away if it even happened. Oh and there are 25463765 other people fishing in the same river so the odds are against you for a fish even being interested in your particular line. That and I can go to the bathroom anytime I want, oh and *not* freeze my ass of the entire time. And I don't have to spend 8-12 firggin hours doing it. So I'll take virtual fishing over RL fishing.

Midna is a hoot as well, she's really helped add some character and humor to the game. LTTP got kinda "lonely" going everyewhere by yourself, and Navi made me wish I had a fly swatter handy (I call Navi "captain obvious"). The whole twilight thing is pretty interesting, kind of a nice twist on the whole "dark world" thing. The enemy design seems fairly original as well. I was thrown off when they showed how pixelated the door to the twilight realm was.

The strategy guide I picked up for it is absurd. It's a hardback (it may even be leather bound) book with gold edges. It is insanely detailed. Every page is about 2 minutes worth of gameplay, in fact I'd say it's excessivley detailed. I still think Lunar 2 had the best strategy guide I've ever seen, but this is a damned close second.

I'm going to go back to OOT and finish that up before seriously hitting up TP. Like I said not too much left (just three rather large dungeons). I've done most of the side stuff I care to, though I may grab another hear or two (I have 15 now, with 2 more from bosses ahead). I'll undoubtedly do some big writup on it once I finish, though I suspect I've got a solid week of gameplay left.

woot! classes canceled!

Tue, 13 Feb 2007 20:39:07 GMT

So it's technically blizzard conditions here and the canceled classes for today. We're supposed to get a foot and half of snow with high winds. From the looks of things outside that looks about right. Fingers crossed for tommorow! This is pretty remarkable since I think it's been well over twenty years since they've canceled class here. So I'm going to enjoy this day to relax and get caught up.

Thank god I had the foresight to hit up walmart and the liquor store last night to get stocked up.

Wii - First Impressions

Fri, 09 Feb 2007 23:54:35 GMT

So I've played Wii Sports a decent bit. I'm most impressed by how the best way to play is to actually act like your doing the real thing. Swing the remote like ball, move your arm like your rolling a bolling ball, and box like you're actually boxing, etc. I'm most impressed with the boxing and the bowling game. Those strike me as being very accurate. I think the baseball game is a cheater (I rarely hit anything except fouls and my outfield is horrid). The Tennis game is fun but it can be awkward at times. The golf game is the worst of the bunch since it's bloody hard to guage how hard you need to hit. I nail the ball right from the start and that seems to work, but putting can be very frustrating. When I put like it's an acutal putter it doesn't register, so I hit a little harder and launches across the green. I need to find that happy medium.

I use DSL so I haven't gotten around to hooking it up to the network type thing yet. Not terribley motivated to at the moment (oddly only thing I've heard that interests me is having the weather... god damn I'm getting old).

So I decided to finish Ocarina of Time before starting Twilight Princess. To save time, I loaded up my old saved game that save me alot more time than I thought it would. I had actually put quite a bit of work into doing sidequests. I watched some speedruns online to refresh my memory of the gameplay and the plot. I've got like 4 temples and the final dungeon to go at this point. I don't think I'll be able to beat it over the weekend, but who knows. I'd like to get 2 temples down tonight, and the rest will depend on how my homework/studying goes. A lab report, 2 math assignements, two sets of analog homework, AND it would be a good idea to start studying for digital... that's just the bare minimum I should do more to be honest. Ugh. At least I'm taking tonight off.

*Math crits moody for 200*
*Department of Defense casts Auto-Life on moody*
*Math begins casting exam 2...*

I found out I can fail the course one time with no repurcussions, as long as I keep attending class till the end. They'll also remiburse me for a reasonable amount of tutoring costs as well. That takes a load off, though I'm figuring out this new section out a lot more than the last one. I picked up a list of approved tutors and will send out some emails tommorow. Still a pain in the arse.

Just scored a sweet shirt at the liquor store. I was picking my weekend case of beer (I've developed a taste for Miller High Life - 50 cents a beer and it's got this cool retro vibe going). I got a shirt that says "Miller High Life Athletics - West Laffayete" (which is the city I live in now).

Nintendo Moodii

Wed, 07 Feb 2007 03:06:23 GMT

Well I just found out I absolutley bombed my math test. 80% of my grade comes from tests in that class, so I'm pretty much fucked. On the bright side, I'm doing well in my other classes but that one has turned into a train wreck. I can't drop it or I'll be under the necessary credit hours to get the MGIB, and I don't think I can drop back to the lower math class since it won't count as a credited class. I'm going to half to work my ASS off to pass the class now and hire a tutor. The worst part is I thought I did pretty good after the test. The curve will help me a little, but not enough to save me. I'm going to talk to the VA and my counselor to see what my options are, but I suspect I'm stuck with the class. I may be able to drop back into a really low math class (certainly wouldn't hurt reviewing at this point), but I'm concerned with staying on plan. I only need two years of math, so getting thrown a little of targert isn't the end of the world. I just figured I need to make about 81% on the remaining tests, including the final in order to pass with a C. The curve will give some slack, but we'll see.

On top of that it snowed a ton today. Like around 6 inches. It's been a long cold wet nasty day. Tommorow looks to be even worse - I've got a full schedule, a lab to finish after class, and alot of homework.

I'm starting to wonder if I made a mistake getting out. I love the freedom I have now, but life was a hell of a lot easier in the air force. Yeah, I had to listen to morons, put up with gay shit, PT, and live in the middle of nowhere but I had so little responisibility. About the only time I can relax now is on the weekend, and that certainly isn't guranteed. I like my freetime and I'm used to having it, which I don't anymore. I think maybe I've bitten off more than I can chew, or maybe care to chew is a better way to put it. Actually, I don't mind the electronics too much - I can get Bs with a moderate amount of effort, it's just the damned fucking math and that's going to be waiting for me in pretty much every major outside of basket weaving that I pursue. I've thought about transfering into computer science. Not as good a job market, but I think I'd enjoy myself alot more there. Eh, I think I'll grow to enjoy this major once I get two years under my belt. I like the idea of being able to build all sorts of random crap. Once I graduate, I'll probably have very little to do with electronics (probably just supply chain) anyways. If they'd give me all day in lab I wouldn't mind it so much. 3 hours is too short. I'd just as soon get 8 hours in there. Man that would be nice. They have open lab, but it's not the same without the instructor there.

--non emo whining shit starts here--
At least my day has a had a real bright silver lining to the dark cloud that has hung over it. Since it snowed so heavily today, my spidey senses told to me to go down to EB. Now, I had decided to get a Wii for spring break (since I'll probably just be hanging around my apartment) and had planned on swinging by EB to see if I could reserve one, since I figured it would take a month or so to get one after putting a name on a list or something. But my spidey senses were tingling... I could sense that I needed to stop by there in this horrible weather. So I got out the old jeep, put it in four wheel drive, and drove on down to ye olde gaming store. Sure enough, they had just got them in that morning. Since the weather has been bad enough to kill a taun taun, nobody had stopped by asking for them like usual. He said the usually sell out shortly after getting them in. So I scored a Wii today! I picked up LOZ:TP and teh uber hardback strategy guide (with a cloth map) for it as well. I probably won't start till at least this weekend, more likely spring break. I think I'll finish OOT first before I dive into it. I'm sure Wii sports can keep me amused. I decided I'd spent enough and am going to wait for next paycheck to grab anything else. I'm actually thinking of getting Madden not only for your recomendations, but also becasue...

COLTS WON THE SUPERBOWL!!!! I was actually on the edge of my seat watching the entire thing. This was probably the first time I've ever been excited about football in my life. I've only been a Colts fan for a few years now, rarely watching games but always following their progress. I try to catch the "big" games when I can. I've seen them fail in the playoffs so often, it was amazing seeing them win the big one, the goddamned super bowl. I used to follow basketball quite a bit, and it was always dissapointing to see my teams lose (I was a Blazers fan way back in the day when they kicked serious ass... sadly, those were the days of MJ in the Bulls.. I can't remember how many years we ended up losing the finals...), so it was really cool actually seeing my team win the big one. Here in lafayette - halfway between chicago and indy - we're actually split down the middle between colts and bears fans. Made monday quite interesting.

Think I'll go hook up my new toy now. I'll probably do another post this weekend about my oppinion of it.

Link to the Past PWNED

Sun, 04 Feb 2007 07:36:10 GMT

I just finished Legend of Zelda: Link to the Past. I played the original SNES version on an original SNES. Damned fine game. I started it about a month ago, though I’ve only seriously played it for about 3 weekends. It’s pretty short to be honest, though I was playing with a walkthrough (in the form of an online walkthrough at gamefaqs.com). Of course I am used to huge ass RPGs so this was probably just normal. I wasn’t religiously following the walkthrough though. In the overworld I followed it pretty closely, but dungeons I’d usually dive in and explore and try to figure things out on my own first. Once I got stuck then I’d consult the FAQ. All said and done I died 60 times apparently while playing. It sounds like a lot, but keep in mind how much I suck at video games in general.

This is the second Zelda game I’ve beaten, the first one being Wind Waker. All said and done this game was brilliant for it’s time, but I think I enjoyed Wind Waker a bit more. I think Wind Waker had a sense of humor to it that LTTP was lacking, as well as a more complex story, but that’s to be expected. I think this game had a great balance of challenge and game play. As I play the old NES games it occurs to me how often they try to make up for lackluster game play by making the game absurdly challenging which is really cheap in my opinion. SNES managed to maintain this balance a lot better, and LTTP is no exception. The graphics were great too considering when this game was released. I still think FFVI is the best looking game on the SNES, but some of the dungeons looked fantastic in LTTP. Relative to the system, I think it looks better than Ocarina of Time to be honest.

I pretty much did all the extras, including getting all the hearts. Only thing I didn’t get was the “bombos medallion”. Everything else I got though, even if I didn’t use it. I’m not an OCD completist like some people, but I enjoy getting whatever I can as long as it’s fun and not too insane (FFX ultimate weapons, I’m talking about you).

Beating this game is kind of a big deal for me since I remember playing the game at friend’s houses back not too long after it first came out desperately wanting to play more. Since I was never allowed to own a console game system, I could seldom play more the first dungeon (as in the castle) in the overworld, or basically the intro to the game. 15 years later, mission complete.

I really enjoy the formulaic progressive game play that Zelda has. You start off with very little, but each dungeon gives you a new ability (and more energy) to help make you stronger for the next dungeon. Each new ability also unlocks numerous new areas that lead to even more abilities and upgrades. And then you throw in a big free roaming world to explore.

I also liked how it came to an end – something lacking from my WoW days. There was a point when the game was finished. Ganon defeated, Zelda rescued, Triforce obtained. That was it, credits rolled, game over. In WoW there was never an “end.” For someone like me who enjoys progressive game play, it was very addicting to keep on going since there was always something else new to achieve and obtain.

I really like the mythic qualities that the Legend of Zelda series has as well. There is something refreshing in the simplicity of Link’s quest. Rescue the Princess, defeat the villain, save the world. How much more classic can you get than that? Certain events you know are going to happen but always feel satisfying when they do, like getting the Master Sword for example. Another cool thing is how the Zelda games seem to come in pairs. I’ve been researching the series and every gaming generation seems to have about two Zelda’s each – one with the classic Ganon storyline, and another that that is quite different in nature though still similar in style.

I’m debating what to play next. I’m thinking Ocarina of Time since that’s the other big Zelda I haven’t finished. I’d probably want to restart it though since it’s been over a year since I last played it (last time I played it I had *just* became adult Link). Or I could dive into the original Zelda. It’s only 8 or so Dungeons and I don’t think it would take too long to do. I SHOULD finish FFXII, but I seem to be lacking motivation there. I’ve also thought of playing through Super Metroid while I have my SNES dragged out, but I’m not sure.

Of tests, syntax and triforces

Fri, 02 Feb 2007 04:15:22 GMT

Well I have my first test of the semester tomorrow (Analog). I should be fine, though I'm concerned that I may not know all the formulas I need too. It's over transformers and rectifiers which I understand, it's just the details I get hung up on. I'm more worried about my math test next tuesday... I'm a lost ball in high weeds in that class. Any time I think I understand it I quickly find out I'm more behind than I thought.

At least digital and programming are going well. I'm kicking ass in digital which is a nice change. Granted, I'm working my ass off on the labs, usually spending a good 4-6 hours on it before I even show up to lab. But I blow through it pretty quick, usually only running into some wiring errors. Though I did have to design a non-recyclying 99-1 down counter the other day - and hook the bastard up to an LCD display. Yeah that was a bitch, but I was like second one done (not that it's a race or anything but it's nice being done when everyone else is banging their heads against the wall).

I'm really enjoying my programming class. I'll probably end up focusing on digital for my B.S. so it's good that I'm enjoying it. My professor is worthless beyond measure, the book is poorly written, but my TA is worth his weight in gold so that makes up for it. He's kind of a character - a grad student in at least his late twenties who dresses in (conservative) western clothes with a big ass belt buckle. He has a pimpin' fu manchu mustache to boot. Knows his shit, that's for sure. Had a to write a sort of simplified tic tac toe game today in lab that was about 500-600 lines of code, which in the grand scheme of things isn't much, but for me that's huge. Most of it was repetitive (though I had to tweak addresses and what not) though. It's pretty cool since I know enough now that I could probably write my own text adventure game (like the old "Zork" series), though I don't think I'm quite that motivated. I think this may be something I want to get more into. I like programming on the digital electronics side of the fence too. Real detail driven and it's cool seeing it all come together and work.

I'm starting to get a LITTLE bit more social this semester. Not much though, just getting to know more of the guys in my major. Most of them are 18-19 year old kids, though there are some old farts hanging around. I ran into an ex-air force guy today. He was cop at Mynot for 8 years lol. It's nice having people to study with, though it is kinda hard to relate to a lot of the people here. I have started to hang out a little bit with some geeks from my major who I've been studying with. I occasionally enthrall them with tales of my adventures around the world. I really have to watch my language, that's one of the things I miss about being in the military. Being able to let loose all the time, teh good ol' days.

I get really pissed at the kids who think they're still in high school. Guys who sit in the back and crack jokes the whole time and make fun of the prof and lecture (and the jokes are lame as well). What the fuck? Don't they know they're (or their parents at least) paying for this shit? I'm trying to listen to the god damn lecture. I don't need your inane commentary. Sure every once in a while it's not out of place to make a comment on something unusual a prof, but I hate the whole "to cool for school routine." Grow the fuck up. Thank god I'm not in the dorms here, or I'd have killed some of them by now. I think trigonometric functions are as pointless as the next guy, but I still have to know them for the test. I was hoping a lot of them would be weeded out by this semester, but no luck so far. Some guys have defied all logic and reason by continuing to be in the program. Must have gotten through by the skin of their teeth all I can figure, though I think we just lost our only girl (I know she didn't make it through analog last semester, and now she just dropped back to last year's digital). I think she is still in C though. Of the 130 people who started with us last fall, I think we're down to about 75.

I've been on a retro gaming kick recently. I've been having a blast playing through the Zelda: Link to the Past. I've got 5 more dungeons to go! Not sure if I'll jump back in FFXII or pick up another Zelda after that. I'd like to finish Ocarina of Time before I start Twilight Princess. We'll see. Me finishing ANY game is a big deal since it rarely happens. I'm thinking of trying to get a Wii this spring, maybe do that for spring break. I've been horrible tempted to get TWP for GC, but I've restrained myself thus far. Funny how you can find PS3s now but Wii's are still sold out. Nintendo's gambles paid off it seems. TAKE THAT SONY! We'll see where the dust settles for next-gen DVDs, that's what'll make or break Sony. It's cool that Wii is outselling the PS3 and they're making a profit unlike Sony who loses money with each system. Just goes to show that gameplay and innovation does triumph over raw hardware power. I think the Wii is going to alot of great things for gaming since companies won't be scared of making games for it, and all the non-typical gamers it'll bring in. Instead of pissing contest for the next Halo/GTA clone it'll be genuinely original content.

By the way I've been loving this song. It's from an upcoming anime by Satoshi Kon. He is the "Hitchcock" of anime responsible for Perfect Blue and a lot of other great movies (I know he has scored some Oscar nominations, not sure if he was won any yet... the academy is a bunch of friggen morons who award movies like "finding nemo" and "cars" instead of the really interesting stuff). Most of his movies could be done live action, but he chooses anime instead which is interesting. The artist who did this song is releasing a lot of songs for free download in protest of america and japan's support of us. Odd way to protest, but whatever.

mp3 - http://www.teslakite.com/freemp3s/paprika/byakkoya-no-musume.mp3
official site - http://www.sonyclassics.com/paprika/main.html
trailer - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ERaLC28EaQo

Arrr

Sat, 06 Jan 2007 22:05:50 GMT

So after hitting up Disney World and seeing pirates everywhere I went (once they have a hit, they milk the hell out of it), I decided maybe I should see the new Pirates of the Carribean movie as I had been putting if off for quite some time.

So I rented that along with the first one (since it had been quite a while since I'd seen it) and watched them back to back. The first was as good as I remembered it. The second one... Well, it was good but I feel kind of ripped off by the ending. Might as well call the damned thing "Pirates of the Caribbbean: The Pirates Strike Back." At least they didn't freeze Captain Jack in carbonite I suppose. See, you have cliffhanger endings like in that in a season finale for a TV series, not a movie! Now if it's based on a book, there isn't much you can do, but christ people it's a movie based off of a themepark ride - it's not much to expect a solid ending.

Aside from that, it was entertaining. The fish people thing was pretty cheesy, but I know they wanted to do something other than zombie pirates again as well as something that would utilize special effects. The Kraken was pretty cool though, as I've always been fascinated by giant squid.